Tuesday, December 23, 2008

The Airing of Grievances

On this Festivus day I thought I would take that extra step to air some grievances.
  • To Andruw Jones- This Dodger fan can no longer stand it when you strike out and smile. It's killing me and is the root cause for our vocal consternation at games. So don't do it, dammit!
  • To the McCourt's- Why is it that I cringe every time either of you speak? I just don't know. All I do know is that I got my eye on you for the "Feats of Strength."
  • To Ned Colletti- Your incompetence in the Jason Schmidt matter makes me want to scream. I should have known better than to ever trust a former Giants GM. You have disappointed more than you'll ever know.
  • To Troy from West Virginia- I know you love Joe Beimel, but he will not make or break the team. It's time to find a new man-crush.
  • To Russell Martin- When you sported that porn-stache I laughed, but now I realize it was just bad. How can you go from being Alyssa Milano's crush to a Jeff Kent wannabe? It's just disappointing.
  • To Manny Ramirez- Dodger fans are ready to give you their loyalty, hearts and soul. You could be the new King of LA. Why can't you return the favor? Just sign, already!
If you have any other disappointments please share them. I'm moving on to the "Feats of Strength." Do you think Frank McCourt would enjoy me knocking on his door in Malibu?

2 comments:

  1. Thanks for marking festivus. I would have forgotten.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Rafael Furcal's contract with the Dodgers isn't official until he pins me!

    ReplyDelete

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